A resignation of trust.


A formal and bitter complaint has arisen.
One whose place is confounded,
Yet necessary
Regardless.

Upper limits meet escape hungrily.
Awareness follows the body leading into hopeful positioning.
The body, like the future, moves interestingly towards some unknown fixed location.
The mind is along for the ride.
Resignation to the mind’s current limits,
Furrows the bodies attempt to progress past invisible walls.
In escaping the minds limits,
The body welcomes new ventures,
the psyche moves forward tentatively.
Like sudden darkness in an unusual place,
Our hands reach out grasping for anything familiar.
Grating, stinging, burning, as light enters our eyes,
Following realization of uncertain conclusion.
An unwelcome place is now my certain home.
Body lead,
Mind followed.
Well…
Mind found itself following.
Better to find yourself as one in an unwelcome place
Then comfortable fractured as mind and body apart.
Unease slowly wears off as new unfolds.
New never stops unfolding.
Unease is now certain.
Constant
Unceasing
New.
Effort to make new normal,
Meets incomplete inclusion,
Leaving more to be dealt with.
A rope suspended between two trees straddling hungry gorge.
Everything familiar on one side, and I anew the other.
Unending anxiety as I hold my breath catching in my eye vision of a fray in the rope.
Seconds, minutes, hours
Effort
To bring
one
by
one
The things that made me feel like I belonged over to the new place I am in.
While I watch hopeless as frayed strand by strand unravel before my eyes.
Unraveling before my eyes,
Like what I thought I had under control,
Confidence in myself,
Belief in hope,
Needlessness to fear.
One by one each thread frays.
Unwilling to watch what I have left to love plummet forever away from me.
I decline to attempt anymore.
Better no one get it,
Then watch the pit devour my soul.
Alone with what few things I have left.
I suffer
alone

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