Spiritual Canvas

A lingering betrayal of incapable truth. Contending with my aimless thoughts. Damning me without hear me. A punishing scorn for the egregious pain of life. My solution is my punishment. My pain, the only correcting force. My sins unjustified. Confidently confronting corruption callously. A speck of dust in my eye. I dodge your wooden weapon. A beam lodged in your eye. If only my son was correct, then it would make me whole. Lies wrapped in intention. Cold acidity, melting away your integrity. Lies carve away beneath the foundation. Thumping steps betray the emptiness below. Nothing walks on your foundation. No ringing hollow steps. The truth routed. Darkness of blurry confusion. Distraction. The fact that your solution for me, Was to send me into lock up, Before you ever cared to hear me out, Hurts me deeply to my core, I was never crazy, I just was never heard

On stage I watched someone put clear packing tap on their arm, Rip it off, hold it up before the crowd so you could see all the dead skin, hair and oil smudges. And they proclaimed before the crowd, this is what happens when you are sexually active with someone that isn’t your husband or wife, you aren’t supposed to “cling” to another then be ripped away. When you try to “cling” again look what your bringing into the next relationship. How bleach white the perfection of your towering throne. Your perfect perch to pronounce your proud proclamations. The edge of your words cutting my flesh. It only matters that your world makes sense. My world can shudder as your reality bends it to yours. There is no problem there. As long as you sleep with the comfort that you didn’t have to make any difficult concessions. Isn’t it so much easier when other people have to change to what you want? You’re sullen emptiness begs for more than your solitude on your king’s chair. But hey, what’s right is ...

Glassless eyes flutter Shimmer depths draping drowning screams Ragged underwhelming Snuffed out presence Dimming as the flows call deeper to plunge As the light above parts further into the everlasting A reaching hand betrays the too late sinking surface away from you. Watch your world plunging into darkness as the load you claimed to be able to endure Drowns you deeper and deeper beneath the fractured surface My allowance is a pittance of suffering. I’ll spend it eagerly and hungrily to satisfy my endless swallowing emptiness Deepening and widening the empty pit. I resent everyone for not helping me when I refused to ask them for help. I hate them for not reading my mind when I lied and said I was fine. This is what your bitterness towards my innocence wanted. You wanted me to end up an undying angel of hope. Hardly you realized, the cost for the eternal. Now I drift not dying in the bottom of an endless scream of drowning existence. Thanks again ...